Happiness is an empty fruit basket filled with cat.

August 19, 2011

Pee'ing the Cat

How does that saying go? "No good deed goes unpunished." Yes, that's the one.

A few months ago, I had a home with three loving cats. They loved me, they loved each other, and life with my cats was mostly good. Life was so good, I decided to adopt a fourth cat.

Enter Spike. Gone were the good and carefree days! Gone were the days of all litter boxes in one location! Gone were the days of all cats sharing one food bowl!

Spike the 14-year-old, yet amazingly active, cat deserves to be treated like a king. He spent most of his life as a performing animal. As far as I know, this is his first home. Unfortunately, my other cats do not agree with my sentiments toward Spike.

But let me tell you how rewarding Spike Purrs are. Or, how happy it makes me when he cuddles up with me in bed for a few minutes before one of the other cats runs him off and the hissing show-down begins. And Spike loves to play, and he plays hard. Only, the other cats believe all 129 toys belong to them alone.

The Ringleader of Mean is Osho, my youngest cat. Apparently, he’s a litter box bully. I’ve instructed the vet to change Osho’s name on all the forms to Butthead.

Back when life was good – just a few months ago – all the litter boxes were in one bathroom. But now, thanks to Osho, they are spread out all over the house. My Cat-Space Clean-Up Time has trippled.

And here is where the story turns ugly. Spike quickly learned that when he scratches in the litter box, Osho comes running. Spike’s answer to this is to stop using the litter box. My bed makes a nice substitute. I really dislike sleeping on plastic…

Spike has found a few other creative places to pee. Suffice it to say that there can be nothing made of cloth left on the ground if you wish it to remain pee free. By the way, washing bed linens in vinegar helps with the smell a lot.

(As an aside, I came home one day to find that Osho had somehow managed to pee inside a garbage can with a lid. That incident is now referred to as Circus Pee’ing.)

Anyway, back to the matter at hand – Spike. The Spikers.

I have tried everything. I have three Feliway diffusers spread around the house. I tried positive reinforcement with the cats using cat treats. I was locking Spike up in the laundry room while I was away from the house until the roommates started to complain that they needed to do their laundry (And Spike now refuses to be locked up). I used tin foil as my bedspread (That didn’t work, either). I tried water pistols against Osho. I have even hissed at Osho when he misbehaves. (Which scares him, but doesn’t stop the behavior from happening again). I am, quite frankly, at my wit’s end.

The only solution I have found is this one…

Every morning and every evening and whenever I can in between, I pick Spike up, put him in his litter box, and stand guard until he is finished.

I am pee’ing the cat.

I have a few days coming up when I’ll be away for about 12 hours, and I’m not sure what to do. I think I will have no choice but to lock Spike up in the laundry room on those days. The Feliway runs out in a few weeks, too, and I cannot afford anymore. I feel the Feliway clock ticking. Tick tock tick tock; tick-tocking towards aggression.

And don’t think it’s just about the litter boxes. I now also bring Spike his water.

The only behavior being modified in this house is mine.

August 8, 2011

Scammers on Craigslist

I saw this on another person's blog:  http://www.rentingoutrooms.com/ and thought it was a great idea; so I'm going to do the same thing.

Whenever I encounter a scammer on Craigslist, I'm going to post their email address here so the google bots will pick it up.  If you are doing business on Craigslist and something or someone sounds too good to be true, google, google, google.

Oh! I just found this entire blog dedicated to outing Craigslist Scammers:

And another:

These people are running scams on Craigslist:


"davis sophia" davissophia1@hotmail.com










"Chrisette Middleton" settonrose@gmail.com

"Chrisette Middleton" bellunlimited@hotmail.com


"Erica Brown`" dr.direct03@gmail.com

"Becky susan" bbymills1@googlemail.com

"Elizabeth Scorfied" escorfied@live.com

"Katherine Holmes" kholmes112@hotmail.com



"Susan Appleberg"

"sarah williams"



Carol Ann Kemmi





"Erica White"


jane poman


jessica williams


Susan Jerry



victoria morgan

This guy claims to be a CEO of Craigslist and is giving away a free Macbook Pro:

Jim Buckmaster jinnycbji@hotmail.com





"michelle nicolas" happymichelle12@gmail.com

Sandra Arendse sarendsse@gmail.com


Christiana Newton






Susan Appleberg

Linda Scott

"jane poman"

"Sharon Pears"

"sarah williams"

August 1, 2011

Breast Cancer Awareness FB Game? Who are we Kidding?

And what a day I had today!

Birthday, homework, work, Facebook, get spat upon by people claiming to care about breast cancer awareness, state my case, get unfriended by said people who claim to care about breast cancer awareness....and so on.

People are weird.

But, the whole thing did turn out to be quite the sociological experiment.  I am an anthropologist at heart.

For those who don't know what I'm talking about, there are these insipid FB games going around that are supposed to raise awareness for breast cancer.  But for those of us who have been diagnosed with breast cancer, they can be pretty insulting.  And for those who have not been diagnosed, they seem to offer a non-challenging, albiet well-meaning, feel-good, "oh look at how wonderful I am," easy thing to do that doesn't cost them anything.

The first time around we were asked to post our bra color.  Um, really?  For a bunch of women who no longer have breasts, this can be kind of hurtful.

Then there was the one where we were supposed to say, "I like it on" and then list where we put our purses.  "I like it on the kitchen table."  Or some other stupid nonsense.  Mildly risque?  Because NOTHING says sexy better than mutilated bodies!

And now we're supposed to list our shoe size.  So, women's FB statuses will say "7 inches," etc.  Again, could be mildly suggestive.  And shoe size has EVERYTHING to do with whether or not you will survive cancer.  EVERYTHING

(Edited to add the new game) The latest game has women state their birth month number as weeks and then say they are craving their favorite candy.  So, mine would be "I'm 8 weeks and craving Reese's Peanut Butter Cups." This is supposed to make people think you are pregnant.  What, exactly does this have to do with breast cancer awareness???  Here's some awareness for you: young women undergoing cancer treatment often lose their fertility due to surgery and/or the side-effects of the treatments.  So after having their ability to ever have children taken away from them, you want them to now participate in this awful game that makes people assume these women are pregnant.  WTH?  Grow up, Facebookers!

(Back to the original post)
So, here's where the sociology experiment comes in.

My cancer chick friends like to post about these games and, oh how we laugh.  We post something in response about how these games do nothing to raise awareness and help no one and how they are often hurtful to those diagnosed with breast cancer - to trivialize the deaths of our friends, etc.  And after posting, wow!  Sit back and watch the fireworks go! 

You see, people support breast cancer awareness, just not actual people with breast cancer.

Today I posted what I thought was a well-worded, but strong (in order to get attention) response to the shoe size absurdity.  The result was a whole lot of people jumping to support the person who had posted the game, and not one single person saying, "Oh!  I had no idea."  Not asking for an apology, or anything, just trying to, I don't know...RAISE AWARENESS FOR ACTUAL BREAST CANCER

I was called bitter and angry (I'm not).  And then, the woman who posted the game unfriended me.  Because, apparently, it was all my fault (I assume).  How dare that breast cancer survivor tell us our breast cancer games are offensive!  The nerve!  We know better than those breast cancer survivors!

And don't think this was an isolated occurrence.  It has been the result for most of us who have posted a "please don't" response to these games.

So, here's the real deal - those games do not raise money for breast cancer research.  They do not save lives.  They don't do anything.

If you want to show your support for breast cancer awareness, donate money to charities that are helping actual people get mammograms/ultrasounds/MRIs.  Donate your TIME.  Clean a cancer patient's house, cook them some food, take the children for an afternoon.  But don't think that saying "7 inches" on your FB page is doing anyone any good.  One person said that "it's better than doing nothing." 

No, it isn't.

Here is exactly what I wrote that inspired the craziness:

As a breast cancer survivor connected to hundreds of other young
women diagnosed with breast cancer, I can tell you that we hate
these games.

Our lives are not games. Our friends have died.

These games do nothing to up awareness for breast cancer.

Instead of participating in these so-called games (that often
offend cancer survivors), please donate money to charities that
are out there working hard to help those diagnosed with cancer.
The Pink Daisy Project is a grass roots charity that helped me
when I could no longer pay my bills after (Edited for privacy) all because of cancer.

Don't trivialize our struggles by making them a game. Shoe size
has nothing to do with breast cancer awareness.

If you've read this far, then take a look at what this woman wrote. She's a much better writer than I am:

I am a 0

Today is my birthday.

And the start of my cancer season.  Cancer season is a season one celebrates alone, generally in quiet reflection, silently checking off each cancerversary – diagnosis date, surgery date, start of treatment, end of treatment, etc. Most non-cancer people have no idea that many survivors do this.  But each and every day, minute, and second is counted and tallied – for the first few years at least.  And lest you think cancer survivors are morbid, we also celebrate the cancerversary when we actually FORGOT it was our cancerversary.  And on this day, my birthday, I also shed a few tears for my friends who are no longer with us.

Birthdays are really, really important.

My cancer story is my own.  I had what some of us call Cancer Lite.  Or, a non-invasive cancer called DCIS.  And though I was “lucky” to find my cancer early, I somehow found myself in the midst of an amazing sisterhood of young women with breast cancer.  Because of them, I had someone to talk to in the middle of the night, and people to coach me through the difficult times. I knew what to expect throughout treatment, and I received great advice on how to work full-time and somehow get to daily radiation treatments, how to dress, how to get through the day, what to do when the pain and fatigue got to be too much, and what to do when my skin started falling apart.  There is no cancer user-manual; there is only the advice from those that came before us.

Many cancer survivors have their stats committed to memory: 1 cm, multifocal, grade 2, w/ comedo necrosis, ER + 50%, PR -.  Currently NED. And though I’m not that great in science, I’ve studied all my treatment options, drugs, and side effects.  I never took statistics in college, but I’ve become a semi-expert in what my absolute risk vs. relative risk is.

So you see, I’m stage 0.  Not that we identify ourselves with our cancer stages (all the time), but it is often on our minds.  My concerns are completely different from someone who is stage 4.  And though there is a world of difference between 0 and 4, camaraderie, love, and support know no boundaries of stage.

This is my “other” life - the cancer patient life.  It’s pretty darn lonely except for a wonderful online community.  So thank you, “sisters,” for all you have done for me.  Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time for some reflection, some tears, and some laughs.

Sometime in the future, I'll talk about how I despise the term "survivor."

If you have some extra change, please consider donating to:

The Pink Daisy Project, a fabulous grass roots charity that directly helps women diagnosed with breast cancer.  They helped me tremendously.  http://pinkdaisyproject.com/

Libby’s Legacy is a central Florida charity that paid for my mammogram, ultrasounds, and three biopsies while I was unemployed.  http://www.libbyslegacy.org/donate.php

And the YSC – Young Survival Coalition – who created the space where I met all these amazing women.  http://my.youngsurvival.org/